potent quotables

[9000]

if i could just describe my aesthetic a bit...

[Patrick]

That is one of my favorite calls... but it also points to a recurring trope (almost a repetitive gag) in all the calls, which is that they will seize any opportunity to describe themselves

"You'll know me... I'm 4 foot 10! I just got out of the army..."

"Well you'll know me, head to toe fubu"

"Let me describe myself, I always wear a full bodyglove, half-sandals and with my dreads pulled back in a scrunchy"

Still the one to which you refer takes it to a next level... the idea of someone saying that and getting taken TOTALLY SERIOUSLY ("I know, I know") is just too great.

Chillin' solo with a diet coke,
PA

[9000]

you can't put a succulent rib in a big foam beak.

[Fiona]

if i could just describe my aesthetic a bit...

Did you try dropping this one last night?

[9000]

whatever it takes to grapple with my own manhood...

[johansen smith]

The Eddie Murphy Golden Child Tom Tom Club Do the Right Thing World Beat Style Hat

[johansen smith]

Gonna be getting my Glenn Close on tonite

[Patrick]

I just want to know if it's doable. That's all, just if it's doable.

[Patrick]

I need to get my motherfuckin' Brimley on. DON'T DENY ME BRIMLEY!

[9000]

cocoon 2: the return

[johansen smith]

I tell ya, Odie gives him the business about every other page

[Patrick]

My wife comes back from Florida, she's got a goddamn margarita glass and fake umbrella tattooed on her ankle, and she's telling me that I've lost my sense of adventure, and I've got a damn Primus backplate right now, and I just wondered: do you do tattoos on the face?

[Futureman]

She wrecked our Le Car (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3V0mRvh14Wc) coming back from seeing the movie Nothing in Common (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLIaitC5FLI). Are you familiar with that movie? Tom Hanks and Jackie Gleason? It's a father/son drama. She had gone out to see that...

[Futureman]

On my lower back I got a tattoo of a monster truck being impaled on an upside-down cross. It's all set against a backdrop of the Canadian flag. And bursting out of it, kinda coming at you, is a Concord jet airliner....I'd like to see if I can have that doctored into the image of "Kenny" from South Park.

[Patrick]

Ice cream's a whole 'nother son of a bitch

[Patrick]

I have to warn you, I'm not the funkiest woman in Memphis

[9000]

no shirt, no shoes, no fuckin' problem.

[Futureman]

If I were a policewoman and I pulled you over, I would give you a ticket for being way too hot.

[Patrick]

Stop fiddle-fuckin' around!

[johansen smith]

I mean in Sandwich Years we're talking about a 200-year-old piece here.

[Futureman]

"Take care and good luck with loserdome."

"OK."

[9000]

well, tell me about 'em.

[9000]

vol 3. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZCXoU31tuQ)?

[Futureman]

Whose playing the role of the kid? The dad?

Is there some voice modifying equipment being used in this call?

[johansen smith]

Jensen is the dad and Earles is the kid

[Futureman]

You might as well throw the logic out the window.

[9000]

i'm a little on the heavy side.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081117/ap_on_re_us/marine_weight_loss

[Fiona]

I despair of this thread.